Tuesday, 19 November 2013

Formulations

Which, as far as I can see is just a fancy word for care plan. Which is just an official word of saying 'wtf shall we do?'
Anyway. Subsequent to a four sessions the psychologist has written up said formulation, a page and a half of type summing up what we've spoken about, her analysis of this and how it affects my patterns of thought and behaviour, plus what she wants to do about it. That's a lot to expect of not very many words isn't it?
Tbf I got over the oddity of seeing myself reduced down and summarised in reports quite a while ago. And this was more accurate than some (one of the best from way back was 'Katie drinks to feel more confident to post in online forms'... really?). I have trouble expressing emotions cos I never did as a kid so I feel negative emotions are bad so I suppress them but that doesn't work so I end up not really experiencing any emotions properly and just venting them as 'behaviours'. Nothing earth shatteringly new there. But at least we're all coming from the same place. She feels I 'can't form real meaningful friendships' which I confess hurt a little as I care for my friends a great deal.
The what to do bit comes in two forms. First: keep taking the pills... and start titrating back up towards full dose now I'm home. Yawn. Second: group therapy. So I can work on how I interact with others. Eep. That's a little terrifying. Though not unexpected cos she had mentioned it before. I struggle a lot with new people, especially en mass, because I don't know how they work and what the proper rules are. I guess that's kinda the point though lol.
So Yep. 11 group sessions in the new year. And a med review near Christmas when I've been on the therapeutic dose for a while. Then 'hopefully you shouldn't be with us anymore'.
Except us isn't 'us' because the service has been reshuffled (it's not just the cabinet that does that apparently) and my case worker has been assigned to a different department. I'm now under the psych lady so she counts as my care coordinator I guess. Little scared of the lack of regular contact for the next couple months but I'm sure it'll all work out. It's a very new service so it's all a bit changeable Haha.

Lala there's your trip into the world of mh care for the day. Figured it may be informative. Though bear in mind there are many many people with mh problems out there getting a lot less help out no help at all whilst being in a lot worse positions. I'm lucky :).
Aaaand here's a sneak peak at a polish I'll be talking about later in the week just to lighten the mood. X